A week or so ago I called a woman who had been a client of mine several months earlier about her emotional eating problem. She had used the Lefkoe De-conditioning Process to get rid of all the triggers we could find and the Lefkoe Belief Process to eliminate all the relevant beliefs. For several months after our last session she had been eating normally and healthily and had been losing weight.
But instead of hearing that the weight had continued to fall away, she told me during my follow-up call that she had gained back all the weight she had lost and was eating badly again. I asked her why she hadn’t called me and asked for help. She said she didn’t know why she hadn’t called
In a situation like this, there are two possible explanations: First, what we had done hadn’t worked. Second, it had worked and there was some other explanation. I decided to check out the second possibility first.
I asked her to tell me everything about her life for the past few months. She told me that she had had knee surgery last December and had been unable to walk, much less exercise for over two months. That could partially account for the increase in weight, but it wouldn’t account for overeating and unhealthy eating. For example, she had totally stopped drinking Pepsi for several months but had gone back to several bottles a day. She was eating pizza for dinner frequently.
Almost in passing she mentioned that after she realized that she would be unable to exercise—which meant to her that the constant weight loss she had been experiencing probably would stop—she had the thought: What’s the use. I’ll never lose weight no matter how hard I try.
That was a new belief that partially explained the re-emergence of her eating problem. So she eliminated that belief. During the session she found and eliminated another, older, belief that had contributed to the problem: Even if I lose weight, no one will ever be interested in me, so why bother.
When we talked the following week she told me that she was not consciously doing anything different, but she was drinking far less Pepsi and had stopped her overeating. She noticed that she would unconsciously go to the pantry, look in, then realize that she wasn’t hungry, and close the door and walk away.
In a second session a week later she told me why she had not been eating healthily during the prior couple of months. Because she was unable to shop and cook for herself because of the foot surgery, she ate whatever her children brought home—usually pizza—and wouldn’t ask them to buy her something healthier and less fattening.
The beliefs she identified and eliminated that caused this behavior included: I can’t count on other people. I’m not worthy. I have to do it on my own. These beliefs explained by why hadn’t asked her children or friends to buy the food that she normally purchased for herself.
A few days later I received the following note from her:
“I just want to thank you again. It is awesome to experience hunger! Before, I was eating all the time and never got hungry. I’m so happy. I feel in control of myself again. I thought if I called you, I was a failure, but now I see how we can still take on bad beliefs that we need to get rid of. I won’t wait next time. Thank you again. I appreciate you so much!”
So although her “relapse” could have meant that the de-conditioning and the belief eliminating hadn’t worked to stop her emotional eating problem, on further investigation we discovered that what we had done previously had worked—and there was a little more that needed to be done.
Don’t ever give up hope. It is possible to totally stop your emotional eating problem.
For more details, please see my eBook, The Secret to Ending Overeating For Good, at http://emotionaleatingreport.com. You also can get answers to specific questions at my office, 415-884-0552.
Copyright © 2011 Morty Lefkoe
One thought on “She was gaining weight again”
Thanks for this. Its very heartening to know and confirm that there are many layers to ourselves and when we undo a whole lot we may still find new ones underneath. It is a wonderful process and its a lot of fun pacing ourselves knowing that we are so well supported all the way.
I read ALL your fascinating blogs and am pondering ways for you to disseminate your teachings to millions. You will hear from me soon.
Blessings for all you do,
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